I’ve been feeling out of place lately. As though I’m not really here nor there.
I have also been very restless. I can’t seem to go to bed earlier than 11pm or wake up later than 3am. I mean, REALLY? From 7am on to 9pm I am go, go, go. Not that I mind that, however it’s easier to function well on more than four hours of sleep.
Basically, I run on caffeine. Whether it be coffee or diet coke or even tea.
I might just need a vacation. What I really need is to move out of my parents house. Things have been kinda tense around there for a year or so. My “goal” (I use this term loosely) is to move out my parents place this coming summer. If that’s going to happen or not is up in the air. I’ve considered many different options as well. Renting an apartment, renting a room, having roommates. You name it, I’ve already considered it. I feel as though the idea of “moving out” has consumed my mind.
But I also feel that moving out is a necessary part of finding myself. Figuring out who I am as a person. The freedom to have my own home and decorate how I please.
I know that my moving out won’t change much. But I know that I will feel lighter and possibly be able to come out of this “shell” more. It’s kinda hard with the parental’s breathing down your neck.
I just want to go to school, teach martial arts, and paint. Is that too much to ask, people?